Wednesday, 31 August 2016

Cross Country

Before you complete this checklist stop and think have you edited your work properly first?
Ask yourself the following questions…                                  Y
Is my paragraph about one key idea (usually in the first sentence) and then supported by more detail in the next sentences.
Does my paragraph have more than one sentence? (2 – 3 sentences is probably best)

Do my sentences have a variety of beginnings?

Are the sentences connected and do they build up the KEY idea (the topic)?

Have I carefully chosen words that are appropriate or right for the KEY idea and the purpose?

Do my sentences ‘appeal’ to my audience?

Are some of my sentences varied? ie. in length or in detail

Have I used a different types of sentences: statements (.)/ questions (?)/ exclamations (!)/ speech (“ “)

I could see the sun shining around the school, people were shaking and looked like they had butterflies in their tames. I could feel my bag while walking past the red gate with a couple of fun friends. The blazing hot shining sun made me sweat super fast and knew that cross county is on. Clap Mr burt was setting up the brown chairs and black lines for the fun event.

The short green grass had brown mud all around them because of the muddy feet. My precious life core was beating faster then a cheater and had butterflies. When the red bell rang everyone got into there home classes and was completing her lift over work. Every single body was getting prepared for the three kilometre run when it was 12 o’clock. They had got into their team colours and had play time and was only 30 minutes.
Ring ring ring everybody lined up in their classrooms and I got ready to head to the gray court. Green as the world, yellow as the sun, blue as water and red as blood is the theme of the colors. They had all of the different kind of colours everywhere around the netball court. Mr Burt took the years 1’s and had his helpful assistants to guide them in and out. The caretakers were watching the kids run and was cheering them on.

It’s our turn and we go before the year 8’s and 6’s because both year 7 and 8 do 2 laps around the Pt england reserve. We all lined up on the dark black line and got ready to run Mr burt said “on your marks get set go.” We had all taken off and we started to go towards the gate. It had taken a long time to do our first lap and when we past the first we went over again. After our 2nd lap then we all found out what place we had came and I ended up 9th place.

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